Yes, some people really are pretty shitty, but not all of them are out to destroy your life. I need to remind myself of this and develop a better habit of allowing people to get to know me. I have had many many many bad experiences with people in my life where the people I trusted did everything to drag my name through mud or black mail me into doing things for them. These people made it impossible to show my face in public for years. Ever since going through that, I don't believe anything anyone tells me. Even the most seemingly kind hearted person could easily stab me in the back. I need to realize that not everyone wants to hurt me. Some really do, but some don't. I need to learn how to find the right people to open up to.
Men. Where to begin? Never had many positive male role models in my life. I used to think all men were abusive assholes behind the mask of kindness. I used to cry if I had to sit alone in a room with any man because I was terrified of them. I can now sit in a room with a guy, but I still get really nervous at times. It's really difficult for me to date due to this very reason. I have my reasons for my fear of men, but we don't need to go there right now. There are some men that should be avoided like the plague, but there are still a few decent ones out there though they are incredibly hard to find. I need to learn to trust the right ones.
JoJo, reading this this breaks my heart.
ReplyDeleteI feel the need to apologise because of how
other men have treated you
I maddens me that these people were *fortunate
enough* to know you ... and then abused such a
privilege by treating you badly - it just really
gets me mad.